I've had a bit of a writers block lately. For some reason every time I've sat down to write, I just can't put anything into words. Today cured that.
This morning Geno and I woke up with Neisan in between us, and the weenie dogs at our feet. We couldn't wait for him to wake up. We couldn't wait to see the look on his face when he saw all those presents! And sure enough, we opened our bedroom door to the loft which was filled with gifts, and Neisan (squinting while his eyes adjusted to the lights) let out his signature, very excited, 'Ooohhhhhhhhhhhhh"!! It was perfect. I mean compared to last year, when all he did was sleep, poop or cry, this was amazing!
After we opened all our presents and ate home made cinnamon rolls, we got ready to go to my moms house. My mom has such a beautiful house. And she fills that beautiful house with more presents than you could possibly wrap your mind around. We scored big time! It took Geno two car trips to get it all home. And we have an SUV. Of course getting presents is great, and giving is even better, but today as I looked around me, I realized just how blessed I am.
Do you ever sit back and watch people when they are in their own world? When they aren't thinking about being on display? Today while my family celebrated, I watched. I watched my brother Jake as he watched his sons opening their gifts. He beamed when the boys got excited. It was like that was all he needed. I watched my grandpa take care of his wife who has Alzheimer's. She can't remember her name most of the time, but she absolutely loves Neisan. So Grandpa made sure to take him to her throughout the day. Because he knew that would make her smile. I watched my mom light up every time someone opened a gift that she knew they would love. We didn't have a lot of money growing up, so she didn't get to buy a lot of things for people. Now that she can, it brings her so much joy to give to her family.
As I was enjoying my family, I realized that not one time had I felt anxious. I was in the moment, and it felt good. I wasn't afraid that the day would come to an end. For the first time in a long time I felt like it was okay. I guess being with the people I love, and the people who love me, made me forget. I'm starting to realize that just because something comes to an end, it doesn't mean it's THE end. It's like when I think about Neisan and how he's growing. Every stage and age that he's gone through, I've said it was my favorite and I didn't want it to end. But then the next stage comes along and I love it even more. That's life. And while I am sad that this Christmas is over, I am finally starting to see that what is to come is just as wonderful as what is happening now. And that is a beautiful thing. And today was a beautiful day.
No comments:
Post a Comment